its not fine
I cant pretend everything is fine, I cant pretend that im okey with this. and no i cant just " get over it" I cant pretend that its OK that i dont see you for half a fucking year...no its not ok. i cant do it, sorry. im not as strong as you hope i would be. Thats just not an option for me. I cant just sit back and let life screw me over AGAIN!, no...last time i accepted it, but this time im NOT. im not gonna let it screw me over like this. im fucking pissed of. WHY?!
why am i ALWAYS the one that makes the effort, why do I ALWAYS have to do everything to make this work! why do i always have to plan everything, and i always have save my entire sallary and live of next to nothing for months and months just to get a little time with you. why am i always the one making this work. im tired of it. i never get anyone to do anything for ME for once! so NO i dont want to do shit right now! if this is how its going to be, SO BE IT! im tired of this shit. im tired of always struggling for everything i want. im tired of time after time being let down and dissapointed. WHEN IS IT GOING TO BE ENOUGH LIFE?!!? im so fucking pissed at you!! why are you doing this to me?! WTHAT THE FUCK DID I DO TO YOU!?
IM TIRED OF FIGHTING. IM FUCKING EXHAUSETED! but i cant roll over and take this, my brain my mind my soul wont let me, its constanlty fighting, rebelling, it wont let me just " get over it" i cant, im not that kind of person.
I DONT KNOW WHAT THE FUCK TO DO! A SIGN PLEASE?! and life....go FUCK YOUR SELF I FUCKING HATE YOU! EVERY FUCKING TIME YOU DO THIS! ENOUGH IS ENOUGH! GO HANG YOURSELF!
why am i ALWAYS the one that makes the effort, why do I ALWAYS have to do everything to make this work! why do i always have to plan everything, and i always have save my entire sallary and live of next to nothing for months and months just to get a little time with you. why am i always the one making this work. im tired of it. i never get anyone to do anything for ME for once! so NO i dont want to do shit right now! if this is how its going to be, SO BE IT! im tired of this shit. im tired of always struggling for everything i want. im tired of time after time being let down and dissapointed. WHEN IS IT GOING TO BE ENOUGH LIFE?!!? im so fucking pissed at you!! why are you doing this to me?! WTHAT THE FUCK DID I DO TO YOU!?
IM TIRED OF FIGHTING. IM FUCKING EXHAUSETED! but i cant roll over and take this, my brain my mind my soul wont let me, its constanlty fighting, rebelling, it wont let me just " get over it" i cant, im not that kind of person.
I DONT KNOW WHAT THE FUCK TO DO! A SIGN PLEASE?! and life....go FUCK YOUR SELF I FUCKING HATE YOU! EVERY FUCKING TIME YOU DO THIS! ENOUGH IS ENOUGH! GO HANG YOURSELF!
slipping
Its all starting to slip through my fingers.....i dont know how strong i can be anymore..
i have so many fucking emotions inside me i dont even know what to do with them. It all just feels like one big mess, eating me from inside. i cant even act normal anymore....whats going on here?!
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i have so many fucking emotions inside me i dont even know what to do with them. It all just feels like one big mess, eating me from inside. i cant even act normal anymore....whats going on here?!
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Totally worth it
Giving up 5 weekends for that one weekend was totally worth it. I would have given up more just to have that weekend again.
My life is rememberd by times like these.
It was unforgettable, every moment of it.
Thank you for being a great vaccation partner ;)
My life is rememberd by times like these.
It was unforgettable, every moment of it.
Thank you for being a great vaccation partner ;)
And now im left with this empty space in my heart again.
you would think i would be used to it
but no..
you would think i would be used to it
but no..